I Have A Dream…

September 20, 2010

I had multiple dreams last night, but as usual I only remember the last one.

I was in some sort of time-space warp which had brought me back to when I was a kid. I wasn’t any specific age, but if I had to guess I’d say I was between ten and thirteen years old. Everything was completely normal, and I was just in my house standing around. The only extraordinary element of this dream was the fact that I knew I was nineteen in reality, and I remembered everything about my real life up until age nineteen. I had simply been cast backwards in time into my pre-pubescent body.

I nostalgically observed the minor details of my house that had been changed over the years: different wallpapers, old wood floors that were now tiled, a tree outside that has since been chopped down. It was sad to re-experience these childhood memories, knowing that in time each of them would come to an end, but at the same time it was thrilling.

I wondered what I should do with my new advantage over the rest of the world, knowing how the next few years would play out. Surely I could avoid bad situations, or prevent global catastrophes. However, I quickly realized that since I was only a child I had no power to change anything. Who in their right mind would take the word of a child seriously if they told you the stock market would have a recession in 2008, or that people should watch out for the swine flu? I couldn’t change anything. To make matters worse I was once again completely dependent on my parents for everything, including food, transportation, and during what hours I would sleep. I couldn’t influence any situation, and I couldn’t decide things for myself. My age was trapping me. I had gone from feeling like a superhero to feeling like a prisoner.

Then I woke up, and was relieved to discover it had only been a dream.

Being a kid was fun when I didn’t know any other way of life, but I think to revert back to that level of dependence would be torture. Youth is something I will never let go of, but only someone at the end of their life would wish for childhood.

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